Mary, Mary Quite Contrary

A 'rock fell to the ground' (sort of) in the form of cousin Mary. It was Wednesday - the sudden public holiday announced by the PM. I had the day planned but her last minute call on Tuesday evening means I will have to re-schedule. Killjoy!

I had to get her from KLS then to her place. Had to show her how to get around from her apartment to her training center. In between the walk, the ride, the food, the drink, the ...whatever, I had to listen to her never ending questions. If I don't answer, she will repeat herself. No escape!

An inquisitive character she is, bordering on the really busy body type. And just so you know it, I FVCKING HATE QUESTIONS. So to pacify myself, it's okay, I thought, juuuuust for Wednesday. I was wrong.

She found me on Thursday and Friday and Saturday and Sunday. In the days after her arrival on Wednesday, I had to endure questions, more questions and continuous flow of questions. They are all seemingly innocent questions but as I have mentioned already, refer above statement in big caps.

Let me give you an example. On the topic of living, here are just a few of the many questions I had to face...

Where do you live? Is it far from here? About half an hour or more? How much is it if by cab? Is there a bus going there? Is there a 'commuter' going there? Ok, is there LRT going there? Who do you live with? What race are they? Are they good? How did you know them? Can you trust them? Are they trustable? How do you know you can trust them? Are they working? What are they working as? Are they your colleagues? Do they work nearby your office? How old are they? Single or married? Do you cook? Do they cook? What do you guys eat everyday?

For once, I really wanted to tell her to STOP BEING A BUSY BODY but out of 'respect' (she's a lot older than moi), I just have to be content saying it out loud in the head. You probably think I made that up, but that's the truth and it's not screwed.

I spent the whole Saturday afternoon till 10pm with her at MV. Towards the evening, when my legs and knees couldn't take it anymore, I told her to do her shopping on her own and I will be movie-watching on my own while waiting for her.

I went to GSC Signature, paid RM20 for a Premiere ticket. But 10 minutes into the show and about to sink into the whole RM20 worth of experience, the guy behind my chair started to periodically 'accidentally' knocked my chair. If you have been to Premiere halls, you probably noticed the legs space between the rows of chairs are so bloody spacious a cow could practically sleep there.

It really is inconsiderate for the motherfucker behind me to do that. Considering my agitated state of mind thanks to Mary's ceaseless verbal 'prodding' earlier, I was considerably calm when I politely told the guy not to rock my chair because I feel uncomfortable and nauseous.

He did not reply. Zzzip. Quiet.

Still, throughout the movie, he kicked the back of my chair more than a couple of times. See, polite seldom works?

Right after the movie ended, I stood up, turned around to face him and said, Hey you, you know there are alot of space between your chair and mine, yet you still kick my chair when I asked you not to!

Instead of apologizing, he had a smirk on his face while saying, Is it? Is it? Is it?

He was pretending to be dumb and challenging me, sort of. Hah! Okay. Sengaja wan lah...

He probably didn't anticipate what I did next. With my vocal 2 notches higher, I told him off (right in front of the other moviegoers) : Of course you did. Are you pretending to be stupid or is your vocabulary really that limited?

He was sitting then, but upon hearing my rather loud 'comment', he quickly stood up and hissed, Bitch!

Hah! Wrong turn.

I replied, Ahhhh yes, apparently I am BUT only to deserving people, LIKE YOU. And apparently too, you only LOOK rich from the outside, what with all the brands from head to toe, but money does not seem to be able to buy YOU brain and manners. Oh wait, by BITCH you mean your girlfriend? That's her naaaaaaaame? The one who deep-throated you just now? Hah! Makes perfect sense now!

He's probably stumped so before he could utter a reply, I left as fast as I could. Hah! I bite! I do!

Eventful? Yes, indeed. I screwed someone.

Stressful? Definitely. My legs, my waist, my knees, my feets, my entire system. I am aching all over.

Brain damage? After all that interrogations, I am almost there.

Right after sending Mary back to her apartment, I thought of taking a rest on Sunday so I told her, Hey I am not coming to see you tomorrow, I need to do my laundry and some other things plus I don't really feel well already, I need rest. You have been here a few days already, I am sure you know your way around to the nearby shops to find food and do your shopping.

By then, I had sore throat, headache, slight fever as I was hot all over and it was that time of the month too. She said, okay no problem.

But that was yesterday.

Today (Sunday), she called up to inform me she's lost in Sg Wang and to please come find her.

I was sleeping the whole day, not because I wanted to, but because I wasn't feeling well. Terrible headache.

Well, I told her this, Can you just ask any of the sales assistant in the shopping mall to help you or find information counter and ask for the way?

But she wouldn't listen. In the end, she said, she'll wait for me to fetch her no matter how long it takes for me to arrive because she is lost and couldn't find her way out. KNNCCB!!!

Seriously! Age isn't a measure of how well a person uses his/her brain to think.

I am not going to blog what happened after. Just enough to make me edgy and an ass, right till this moment.